Monday, August 13, 2007
hey guys! I'm just bored from studying, so I just decided to drop by to post my 1st message!
heartfelt ramblings:.....
A university education is really different from poly.
To start off with, the students are REALLY REALLY REALLY much smarter! Especially the PRCs. Though they may smell and look otherwise, they literally OWN us when it comes to maths, science even economics. The Singaporeans here are so much more motivated than those in my polytechnic. I believe none has entered NUS to graduate with a mediocre degree; all are here to score, to soar and to be above the rest.
Man, tat makes life so much tougher.
Why can't they just slack so I'll have a higher chance of getting a better grade (NUS works on a bell curve grading system)? Why can't these PRC scholars just go back to their own country and make me feel less inferior?
Don't get me wrong, I'm not bemoaning their presence or the competition. It's just this trepidation, this uncertainty. Mounting pressures from within, and without, of not getting the grades that I so desire. My parents have placed lots of hopes on me, and I do not want to fail them. My ambition to enter public service later in my life requires me to have much more than stellar results. I've not read economics - the subject I want to major in - in A levels, unlike many of my peers, some of whom have even taken S paper and have gotten distinction. I've not touched maths for God knows how many years, which is rudimentary for an econs grad student.
I'm reminded of what dr AR Bernard said on Sunday. "You cannot lead a culture you're afraid of."
Am I afraid of the culture in my school? Well, a little. Students are either cranky like the PRCs or cranky like some of my hall seniors. Too much books or too much booze ... I want to find a balance in all this mess. I want to rise up above my fears and do the best I ever can for my future.
I do not want to let my parents down. I do not want to disappoint those who believe in me more than I can ever believe in myself. And ultimately, I do not want to let myself down.
Two years of preparation. In my heart, I know God has placed me here for a reason.
Thanks to all the blogs i referred to(countless) for html code help :) (esp.cyn'and sixseven)
Adobe Photoshop Elements for supernatural abilities
