~Paths of Righteousness~

Monday, November 26, 2007

Procrastination can be a killer... I have wanted to share with you guys via this blog since forever but work has been so busy that I can’t seem to find time, or rather, I cant afford to sacrifice my sleep to blog. Haha! In any case, Holy Spirit’s prompting is finally getting into me, that’s why this VERY LONG LONG post today, makes me wonder how many of you will read the WHOLE of this post. hah! In any case, BEWARE!

Basically I just want to share how God has seen and helped me through my entire job search and enfoldment into my current circle of colleagues. To recall back, I think all my past worries were pretty unfounded because God has proven himself once again to be faithful and true to all His love ones.

Before I began my job hunt in September, I remembered praying really hard for a good career ahead, a career that would be in His will for me so that I could be a step closer in fulfilling my destiny. I was worried, worried about my incapability and incompetence. Although the prayer didn’t make me feel any better emotionally, I did held God’s promises by faith somehow.

As I have shared with some of the cg people, interviews are my worse obstacles in life. Since secondary school, I tell you I dreaded the day of interview. I hated being scrutinised, stuck in my speeches and then rejected. I don’t think I have a lot of credentials to show for either, hence my almost non-existent self esteem. (I’M NOT KIDDING) But I believe my OCBC interview was a God anointed one. In the end, I did manage to elude a sense of confidence, though definitely not from me, but from the spirit of God IN ME who was at work. That interview was only my second interview and I secured it amazingly ON THE SPOT. It’s something that I could not ask for more since I had expected to go through a job hunting period of 2 months and not just 2 weeks! To make things more dramatic, I discovered my interviewer is actually a CHC member too! She even reminded me to pray over Sunday banking so that I could enjoy a good timeslot for service when I expressed my concern over 24/7 sales and church. Cool man!

However, despite all the signs God has given, part of me was still toying on the possibility of ‘coincidence’. “Ah, its just heng. CHC so big! Surely a lot of people from there wat…” or “OCBC so big, sure hires a lot of people.” So, I continued to worry loh! It’s my second nature anyway. FYI, the picture did not turn rosier after the job offer. Instead I was informed that I had to clear FOUR financial papers to start work; otherwise I would be terminated from the offer. But God knows my heart, He continued to show me that He is with me and He is GOD in this entire career. =/ So to cut the long story, I passed ALL the papers and now I am finally a confirmed staff of OCBC, purely by God’s good grace! =D

Looking back, the whole of October was filled with immense anticipation and anxiety. Being the faint hearted Christina, I spent a lot of time worrying and whining in prayers to Him. But ironically, it was also the period of time I began growing very close to God’s heart through all the verses during my quiet times and prayers and even DURING the exam itself. I remembered vividly, during one of the papers, I never stopped praying in tongues coz I was so afraid that God’s spirit would just leave me alone. So coward right! I can’t stand myself too. But then suddenly, God spoke, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” “So don’t worry! You will pass! Not just for this paper, but for the REST of the papers.” Just like that, right smack in the middle of the exam. And there after, I felt a great deal of peace and assurance, because when I’m weak, then I’m strong. =) Right time, right place!

Coming November, the start of work in an unknown world of unfamiliar faces, just when I thought all the good stuffs were over, God placed a fellow Christian in my circle of colleagues to edify me, constantly building me up and reminding me about God’s presence in my work. This colleague has been such a blessing that work is no longer a dread because at least, I know of someone else who shares the same value as me. Last Wednesday, she said during her prayers for me, she felt God urging her to assure me that I will prosper and reign in this job. Just remember to walk behind Jesus, not beside, not in front of Jesus, but behind, so that He will be able to guide me correctly. A lot of times, being Mary seated at Jesus’ feet is all that He requires of me. Then she was reminded of a song, which was very apt, which goes;

This is your destiny; it will be fulfilled.
This is your destiny; on a city hill.
This is your destiny; it is not an empty wish.
This is your destiny

I was awed…. What can I say?

After so many awesome encounters, I can now confidently declare about my conviction that Christ is with me EVERYDAY of my life, no such things as coincidence, really. A thought like this only comes from the devil. I am Christ’s beloved. Now everyday is a new battle for me, facing different faces every hour, digesting new information every second. I don’t deny my fears and worries. In fact, still have lots of them. But now, I finally learned how to claim the PEACE of God and control my raging fears because Christ has overcome THE WORLD, my world, your world. Believe it, because Jesus says it.

chris blogged at 12:01 AM

You lead me...
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